Commencement

The term Commencement Ceremony can be confusing. Commencement means to begin, yet it is at the end of high school or college that we use the word. One would think graduation would be called a Conclusion Ceremony. 

After listening to the Massachusetts Maritime Academy (MMA) Commencement Ceremony speeches, the use of the word was unmistakable. The speakers talked about the future, a new beginning, and the commencement of the cadet’s next chapter in life.

I watched the MMA graduation ceremony through live-stream. From the dry, warm surroundings of my dining room, I watched as the rain poured down, a constant background noise as it bounced off the white canvas tents. The administration handed out diplomas according to major. Name after name, the cadets paraded in their dress whites. Short, tall, male, female, and all nationalities march across the stage to get their diplomas. 

The cadets had one thing in common, their uniform: a white hat, white jacket, white pants or skirt, and white shoes. Their name tags, ribbons, and epaulets were aligned perfectly. Their hats tilted just right. They all did the same thing as they marched across the platform. One by one, each cadet received their diploma, shook hands, and posed for a picture. The parade of white was endless. I was mesmerized. 

But then something happened. Four people dressed in dark clothing came across the stage. A mother, a father, and two teenagers, a girl, and a boy, suddenly filled my screen. That snapped me out of my trance. The father, handsome in his dark blue suit, stood at the back of this group, hiding further behind dark sunglasses. The girl had a hand up to her face, crying into her raincoat. Like the rain, her tears were endless, mixing with her mascara and sending black streams down her cheeks. The boy stood like a statue. It was impossible to read the emotion on his face. His expression was void. 

The mother, in black, including her shoulder-length hair, was the most animated. She received the diploma and hugged it into her chest. She kissed it, held it with both hands and extended it high overhead. Looking into the heavens, she kissed the diploma once more before holding it against her heart. The reaction of the others to this was varied. The father placed his hand on her back. He looked down as if trying to escape. The girl, racked with sobs, now had both hands to her face. The boy remained unchanged.

And through it all, there was applause. The cheers and clapping went on for some time. The family, except the boy, looked out at the crowd. With one hand, the mother wiped the tears from one daughter’s eyes as she held her other daughter’s diploma with the other hand. There was no explanation as to what happened to the missing candidate. None was necessary. The pain spoke for itself. Overstating the obvious, the announcer said that the female cadet’s family was receiving her diploma. And then they were gone.

One by one the cadets resumed their parade across the stage. The contrast was jarring. The cadets were all dressed in white and singly going across the stage. They were starting a new journey on their own. They had done the work, and now they would get to work. The white uniforms were a symbol of a blank canvas. Now it was up to them to create the painting that would be their life.

Yet, the family was in dark colors, almost like paint splashed on their canvas, covering all the white. And all the hope. Their commencement is different, their new journey starting in darkness. Going across the stage and receiving her diploma must have felt like daggers through the heart. And yet, they found strength in togetherness. Ecclesiastes speaks of this when it says, “A threefold cord is not quickly broken.” (Ecc 4:12). 

The image I have of this threefold cord is a braid. Each strand weaves around the other, and when you finish twisting it, no longer are seen three strands but one braid. A mother, a father, a sister, and a brother walked on that stage, but a family walked off. They were one.

We do not know what our future holds. There are days when the world is in our hands. Those days we are the cadet dressed in white, full of hope and promise. There are other days when our future is uncertain, and we are that family, finding solace only in the past.

One thing is for sure - we do not have to face our future alone. Although the cadets walked across that stage individually, their support system cheered for them. These families and friends wanted their cadets to know they were not alone. They were there for them. Each person watching from under the tent, sitting on a hard plastic seat, is a strand in someone's braid.

Some strands are more colorful than others, adding interest and dimension to our life. Other strands are plain but sturdy, giving us security. Depending on how long a person has been in our life determines the length of the strand. When all the strands intertwine, each braid looks different and is as unique as each person.

But the result is the same for everyone. We all have a support system we can count on. On both our good and bad days, we have people who are there for us. And just as we can turn to the strands in our braid for support, we can be the support for others. We can strive to be a colorful, sturdy, and long strand.

Rather than end this with a conclusion, I will do so with a commencement. There is always a new beginning.